Dream starts off with me in the middle of one of those military/action type movies. This one's set in a desert/cliff/cavernous/some shit like that setting in the middle of the night. There are a few red flares set off already in various places. I am now in my bathroom, teamed up with Chuck Norris, who I assume is the inspiration/reason I am in the desert to begin with in the middle of an action movie. I am watching his back as he's peeking out my bathroom window for whatever.
I feel something prick the back of my arm or my back or my ribs or something. I ignore it the first time, but turn around after the second to find a Mexican/Hispanic/whatever girl behind me wearing a heavy (probably denim) dark blue dress that kinda looks like Hinata's skirt over a basic white t-shirt (I have no idea why I remember what she's wearing so vividly) with what is apparently a tazer the size of a Chicklet or something (comparison totally random, by the way) in her clutches. I swipe it away, stick it in between our mouths (think the end of Batman Returns), and we start making out.
The tazerthing has apparently disappeared, she's apparently sitting on the bathroom counter, and now she wants it. I lift up her dress (this is where I notice her dress being heavy, I guess) and move her panties aside, but the countertop is in the way, so we switch to standing position. As we're going at it, I look to the floor for some reason, and I notice a familiar crimson color underneath us. She says she's okay, so we continue. Now she's back on the countertop and her dress is missing. Actually, I think it went missing when we stood up. Anyways, she has her knees on the counter and her hands on the tank of the toilet, and I am apprently going to check if she really is okay or something. I obviously get distracted from this and get ready to work the tongue when I wake up.
This is easily the greatest dream
I ever
had or will ever have.