I remember asking people to read a sample of my novel back in May, but some people said they were busy.  At most, I got this reply to a PM on an anime forum from a user named Norza:

Yeah. I did mention I'd read more of it, but after reading the prologue, but I can't get into the mood of reading it anymore. I did mark up the prologue:
http://puu.sh/8EXSN.pdf *URL is no longer valid, but I have the PDF on my computer*

I think you have to download it and double click on the highlighted content depending on what PDF Reader you use.

The primary reason why I feel disinterested: the language level is entirely simple. I don't recall seeing as words that were elevated or simple words that were used powerfully either. Thus, to me, it felt dull. Also, the wording is consistently awkward. It's specific, but nondescript. I recall I wanted to highlight a lot of other things, but I didn't deem it important.

As the saying or whatever goes, if a read doesn't grab you by the first chapter, then it is suggested to just drop it.
I recall having other thoughts on the prologue, but that one sticks out to me because it is a massive factor when I read something of literature value.

I hope you understand I don't mean to offend your writing with disrespect by saying this as I have stated my reason above, it's just that... its childishly written and I simply can't read it.

I mentioned that the beginning was slow and asked him if he could read the other two chapters included in the preview and he said:

No. The beginnings of anything are usually slow. I am saying I didn't like how it was written in terms of word choice.
I take the final paragraph you wrote had to do if it was slow? Mmmm... I didn't think it was terribly slow. The pace was alright.

So I looked another look at the PDF file and realized that my writing style sucks.  Interesting concepts abd story on paper, ultimately held back by stilted writing.
Too many usage of "said" and "replied", characters that haven't seen much change since their inception in 2012, a story with some things that could be simpler, and only two of three plotlines that actually do fine within the 21 (30+, before I split the 100,000+ word document into two parts.) chapters.  Salvagable, but only if I put a large amount of time into the 8th (I lost count) revisial.

I started a second novel to modify my writing style and that went smoothly until I got let go from my first job and was told to change my life priorities.  But I always have to be creating or working on some sort of project, so that brought in the (short) return to M.U.G.E.N and the creation of a parody AMV.  But now with working third shift at a grocery store, my brain goes into a creative frenzy when I'm on a break.  My damn journal is usually at home, so I have to settle with the memo app on my phone to take notes.

Back in October or November I also made a large Word document to contain all of my notes, because I thought the anesthesia for a simple wisdom teeth surgery might carry a risk of death (actually found that it was quite small compared to a century ago).  Strange how I only cared about making money in and being famous in 2012 to caring about the characters and the story itself.