also this whole thing is kinda out-of-the-blue, have you thought about talking to somebody? Like, not necessarily a therapist but y'know... You don't sound okay.

As you can see, all you've got is bunch of Yes-Guys at MMV, where they don't care about quality overall, and huge nothing here, in the place, where quality is above else. You could as well leave it a small private thing for yourself, yet you still have come here, to the place, that (by your words) hates you, and share it here.
Well, whatever. No one came here to tell you HOW to do the game. No one demands P.o.T.S. Style or something similar out of you. And, as said by the same huge ignore you've got, no one HATES you, because, again, I'm the only one who came with SOMETHING negative to you, and even that, I mind you, is not personal.
If someone would actually HATE you, I think they would flock over here by now, but this is exactly what's not happening. And even my negativity comes from 10 year vet (as you said yourself) making not even an amateur, but barely functional game. Trust me, for 10 years you could have gone real PRO, and you don't even need to grind like insane for that. So, how do you explain this lack of improvement you talk about so muh RN, that you've supposed to had over these 10 whooping years? Do you understand now why I was so rough with you?
At any rate, I'm not sure what to make out of this message of yours. Does that mean you're giving up, of you're going through the planned updates after all? I'll accept whatever you pick. But trust me: giving up is NOT a way to get respected here. You already did the first step in the right direction: you accepted the feedback. NOW follow through. Show us all these words about improvement aren't just hot gas. As I promised, I'll be here to see and, if I can, help you with ACTUAL improvement, but ONLY if you're ready to go on. If you won't though, that's your right. But keep in mind, that said abovementioned impression of you have started to get better ONLY because you started showing something that resembles commitment.